wildeabandon | Silent retreat

A few days ago I got back from an eight day silent retreat at St Beuno's Jesuit Spirituality Centre in Wales, and I've got lots to say about it but I suspect that if I leave it until I have time to say everything I might not get round to it at all, so have some bullet points as a holding entry that may or may not get expanded on.

It was very very very good. I scarcely knew there was so much grace in all the world as I encountered there. My faith is deeper and more alive and firmer than ever before. I'm excited about prayer, and I feel as though I'm relating to God in a far more three-dimensional way.

My retreat director was wise and knowledgeable and seemed to understand me very quickly, in a way that made it possible for her to judge when I needed to be challenged and when I needed to be reassured

Other than prayer I spent my time knitting and walking, including a ridiculous and glorious hike of around 23 miles on Ash Wednesday, which included climbing into quite a lot of Weather(tm) in the early morning, and then descending towards an extraordinary panorama framed by a clear, bright, rainbow, and then heading back up to a higher peak and making snow angels in the crisp winter sun.

One big thing I came away with was a far stronger sense of what we mean when we say that Jesus is fully human, which is making the synoptic Gospels feel a lot more exciting and alive
The second big thing I got was a sense that I need to rest more and plan less. Yes, of course the first thing my brain did when I realised this was start planning how I can restructure my life to get more rest...
The third big thing I got was a sense that I need to start taking more seriously my role as a steward of God's creation. One way in which I expect this to play out is in moving towards a more plant-based diet, but I suspect there will be other things as well, and I will be figuring out more of the details over Lent
A fourth big thing was a clearer understanding of what it means to be poor in spirit, both as a general concept and in terms of how it plays out in my life, in helping me to draw ever closer to be coming the version of myself that God wants me to be.